Report

Name: Yudhoyono, S.B

Class: Javanese upper

Geography: His knowledge of Javanese geography enabled him to travel outside Jakarta on the day of the big demonstrations. His opportunistic traveling skills are developing well.

History: Poor performance. The recent banning of books about the 1965 army coup and Indonesia's colonization of West Papua show poor awareness of the need for truth-based history.

Economics: A good start, with the reappointment of Sri Mulyani as finance minister, but seems to have lost track of Rp6.7 trillion somewhere...

Biology: Poor awareness of animal conservation. Unable to help the defenseless anti-corruption gecko when attacked by the police crocodile.

Mathematics: Poor grasp of percentages. For example, apparently unaware that winning 60 percent of the vote in the election means there is no need for pussyfooting around.

Indonesian language: Does not really understand the meaning of words like "demokrasi", and takes criticism of him as dangerous.

Physics: Poor - appears to believe that water can be used as fuel. He was heard referring to this as "blue energy".

Overall: Yudhoyono is a promising pupil with an unfortunate tendency to become very easily distracted. His first 100 days were dominated by squabbles about corruption and a bank bailout, which meant he achieved almost nothing. Must do better.

Farewell to an Honest Politician

Abdurrahman ad-Dakhil Wahid, better known as Gus Dur, Indonesia's fourth president, died on 30 December 2009. The timing of his departure must have given those compilers of "Review of the Year" a bit of a headache as he would have missed the boat. In Indonesia, the effects were apparent in wall-to-wall TV coverage and the cancellation of a few new year fireworks displays. And of course the inevitable silly murder rumors - as if that would be worth doing now.

But he left an important legacy. Not the National Awakening Party (PKB), which resumed its civil war before he was cold in the grave, and which seems destined to shrivel away like other Indonesian political parties built around a popular figure (are you listening Megawati and SBY?). And not in any great oratory to be quoted down the years (except Gitu aja? Kok repot? [Is that all? Why such a fuss?]). Gus Dur stands out because he may have been Indonesia's only honest politician.

Despite the poor reputation of politicians, they don't lie all the time. There are three types of political lie: the factual lie (Example: Indonesian students burned down the Senen market in 1974 - it was actually the military trying to discredit protesting students); lies of opinion or belief (I really care about the people - Example: just about everything Suharto said) and lies about intentions (ditto). Of these three, in democracies, the first kind is the most risky because things get found out. If they do come to light, it's often the end of a political career (but not always). The latter two are impossible to prove either way because opinions are unprovable and because "the best laid plans of mice and men..." respectively.

But Gus Dur appears to have avoided lying almost entirely. Of course he had his flaky moments, and arguably describing the House of Representatives (DPR) as a "kindergarten" was a factual lie - they are nowhere near as well-behaved as infants - but he seems to have been honest in all he said - even if it was destined to land him in trouble.

He protested about the actions of the dictator Suharto - by direct letter on occasion. And during his presidency, he went to East Timor to apologize for Indonesia's occupation, he threw an extremist Muslim leader out of the palace halfway through an audience, he tried to have the antiquated ban on even discussing communism lifted, he visited Israel, he made Chinese New Year a public holiday and lifted the New Order racist ban on the use of Chinese characters, and he made lots of good jokes. And all the time, he said what he thought.

He paid a heavy price for speaking his mind. Not only did the Indonesian "Military" oversee his downfall from the presidency in 2002, allowing his replacement by the more malleable Megawati, but a mysterious car crash in the 1990s paralyzed his wife. Ironically, Gus Dur's own father died in a car crash - perhaps that's where the idea came from...

There are many self-serving Indonesian politicians who would do well to follow the example of Gus Dur. Don't lie about your income, origins, convictions (moral and criminal), intentions, number of wives or past. You may be surprised how much good it does you.

Bye bye Gus Dur. Indonesia is a sadder place without you.